More VooDoo News Dude

Spent the past weekend in Denver. It's not a crime to be a topless woman there. I also got more of them VooDoo Doughnuts. You know it.

I took many walks down Colfax and my friend Emily had never visited the city before so we were little explorers. We walked to an open mic on Saturday at Wild Corgi Pub. Sammy Anzer performed and Alex told me later that he stole a South Park joke that I laughed at. After the show Emily went off with new friends. I went back to my cousin's place and went to sleep. The next day we walked some more and met many people and helped a man named Derrick that spent all his money on weed because he sure is honest. I guess. Walking is what's up. Freedom is what's up too.

Emily and I have several videos we're dying to post on some platform, maybe right on this-here blog. We have much entertainment and fun to provide to the people. I'll make it a point to put some videos on here this evening. The video of Emily topless in Denver will be a fun one:)

BURNING

It's snowy up in here. Hoping to leave work early today, driving on icy roads is only made worse when it's dark out.

Wait... I'm actually in Hawaii right now. In a hammock. With the best margarita I've ever tasted. The kids are playing in the sand and the breeze is too right. A man with a surf board is walking up to me. Hold on...


He let me know that he appreciates my smile and gave me $40,000 and a puppy! It's a perfect little Clumber Spaniel that knows how to surf and his name is Yung Salty. We all walk back to our bungalow and make tie dye shirts and eat fresh papaya on the back patio, where a friendly yellow garden spider is wrapping up a snack as well. A neighbor comes over and asks if we can help her move a piece of furniture. I love seeing inside a new friend's dwelling, and hers is so beautifully decorated. Years of narrowing down just the right embellishments. What an artist. She invites us over for dinner on Sunday, several of her family members are coming and there will be so much food, kids and fun. We all like the sound of it. There are no assumptions about our individual levels of wickedness, it's a simple life.

The H8ing Game

Went over to a friend's place yesterday for a jam session last night. We were gifted a li'l beginner guitar recently and my daughter has been learning chords and dear Brittney offered to teach her (yay, friends!) routine is establishing itself in our lives - mostly routine awesomeness. The friends that challenge me to not be stagnant are definitely chipping away at the depression.

I have a problem with being a thing. Like, "comic" or "musician". It comes with preconceived expectations and rules. "Are they funny?" "Can they sing/play?" When the microphone is in my hand I am in therapy, not everyone signed up for this crap. I suppose I'd still call myself an entertainer, as that comes naturally AF.

Qwik-E

The gig from August got me a paying gig for this weekend. That's neat-o! I'm hosting an all-female comedy show on October 5th in Pueblo.

There have been some great moments recently with friends and some gut-wrenching moments with my improving connection to my intuition. My upbringing was not well-suited for me, it had me refusing to trust myself for some important decisions. The thing is: I'm not an idiot. However, I was taught to believe all humans are basically idiots with bad intentions. Smart enough to ruin it for everyone else and that's it. It is a lot to come to terms with and not just be totally depressed. I'm an anti-cynic disguised as a cynic :)

I'm married to someone with the same upbringing. Plus trauma?! What a mess. Oh lord, have mercy.

Sometimes I think about a time when my children are adults and perhaps it turns out they're struggling to deal with emotions or have a mental illness of their own they must cope with. It is unimaginable that shunning them would be an option at all. Refusing to admit to my own possible oversight in raising them, when they're right there suffering. Sometimes I feel like all some parents would have to do is acknowledge that they should have done things a little differently. Should have encouraged pursuing college at an earlier age (earlier than my senior year of high school, when they offered to buy me a car if I got a scholarship yet didn't offer to help pay for college or any further education). Should have let me have relationships prior to moving (incredibly far) out at 21. Should have refrained from pressuring me to literally marry the first guy that boinked me. Eh, I guess they're perfect (even though that is TOTALLY against their religion to believe). Haha. It's funny and I'm smart and I will never shun my children and I am definitely not about to give up everything I've earned in this life to be "good" according to some wacky band of old dudes. Some wackier than others. Hahaha, y'all JWs know which one I'm talking about:D

In Formation

Hiyeeeee. I'm hosting a comedy show tomorrow in Pueblo, Colorado. I don't have any "material" per se, but I'm an improvisor anyways. Brittney Geisler booked this gig and while we're not getting money, we're gaining some pretty sweet experience for a couple of dorks with a year under our belt of regularly performing. Later this month I'm also recording some vocals with the delicious Ferret and his funky, fresh vibes. This past week saw some interesting collaborations at the open mic. I'm feeling the need to focus on some solo stuff in the nearest future possible.

The kids will be in school next week, it's going to be great for them. Naomi and I have been enjoying our Minecraft time, however. I punched a horse to death in front of her two foals. It was nothing like real life. Naomi and I need to work on a cartoon, she has already animated some little, fun things - a duck farting, "LOL" "memes" etc etc. What a li'l genius. Roland spiked his hair this morning before I left for work and I complimented him and he thanked me. It was just adorable. He came into my room before I got out of bed and just looked at me with his sweet face.

I spent the night at my cousins' (Matthew and Alex) place over the weekend. They live less than a mile from VooDoo Doughnuts in Denver and we walked there and got doughnuts, including but not limited to the bacon maple bar (my favorite). They are in an amazing location. Dangerous (because of the proximity to doughnuts).

BYEEEEEEE

'til Death

Marriage is so metal. When the only person I can control is me, the only reason I would go insane is if I didn't learn to let go of the unimportant. It doesn't mean I have to stop loving anyone any less. Loving myself is important if I'm to remain capable of taking care of what I must. Especially the children. It's unimaginable that I would refuse to do whatever I had to to make sure my kids were able to grow, learn and empower themselves. Even more reason to do what I must to commit to sanity and health. I'm not doing bad.

Hev-E

Whoa. Metal. I went to a show recently that was truly unforgettable. Daikaiju and Giardia were just wonderful.

(not a picture I took)

There was even a mosh pit I got involved in. I'd like to thank Sean Ostrow for the kind invitation and astute encouragement from right around the very second we met. I also took the opportunity to cry on Robert Romesburg's bosom, and would like to thank him for having a wise and comforting presence. This blog doesn't really get advertised, so maybe they'll never see these gracious words. The words are out there though. 

Yesterday I took the fam down to the Pueblo reservoir for the first time - actually pretty great. Especially as I get to missing my sun and surf in these warm, light-filled months. I've been reading a book call "When Things Fall Apart" and it sounds like maybe I'm reading it because things are falling apart, however, things are in a constant state of falling apart and it's great for learning to let go of that which is out of our control. I know I love my family and friends and self. It wouldn't make sense to cling to a way that prevented my growth and the broadening of my love just to avoid perceived pain. 

Skits 'n' Shits 'n' Giggles

That last blog post sure worked me up. I had a great time with my comedian friend and we are now a comedy duo and quite a force to reckon with. If you need to lighten up (trust me, you DO) then Skits 'n' Shits 'n' Giggles are the pair of bitches you should go see LIVE at the open mic on Monday nights at Zodiac Bar & Venue in B-YOOtiful Colorado Springs, Colorado, U.S.A., North America, Earth, Solar System, Milky Way, Universe (believe it or not). I sure seem super serious about this endeavor.

Here's the thing: I just love this performing thing a LOT. The chemistry in this duo is a very efficient and powerful fuel. We planned a little presentation, prepped a little segue, improvised (like I like) and sprinkled a bit of magic on each other's fannies. Look, details aren't my thing - it's just pure and special within the very moment it occurs. We have enough in common and enough different to bounce our thoughts and words off one another like a hot, sexy potato. YES, she has guitar skills. YES, I have sweet moves. YES, we ooze brilliant, healing energy like a bright, golden light.

Benny was there, Jelly Bones, Kai, Saustro, faces I just adore. Oh, Monday: best day of the week. Guy with a Russian accent claiming he was from Boise, Idaho. Matt Gabriel and his critical manner that makes him hilarious. Strange Josh fellow with incredible, chaotic talent. Kevin Pounds with his soul and cheek bones. I judge people. The verdict? They're GREAT!

After performing we hung out outside with a clean-cut, lanky cowboy and made up songs about having no teeth. All the while his teeth were on full display. WHAT TEETH! He had a look like Gomer Pyle.

Mother, May I?

Yo dawg. Remember when you didn't do stuff because your parents wouldn't let you? Having grown up I never thought I'd have so many excuses for why I "can't" do things I would love to do. The excuses have been few and far between these days and it is making a big difference in my quality of life. It's truly incredible to see what a few months of concentrated effort can do. Specific goals aren't easy for me, I have much love for many generally creative endeavors. What if I were to decide to focus energy on just one? If so, it would be comedy. At least that's how I feel today. But that feeling will change. Performing is the general pursuit at the moment. The universe will guide me beyond that. Someone has some fresh bread in my vicinity and it's KILLING me. Want.

I invited a local comedian over this weekend. Maybe we'll record a podcast! The thought of whipping up some theme music and fake commercials alone has me sold.

Time for the Funk

Bro... I moved into my very own apartment. Having a kitchen again is making me near explosive with happiness. I'm taking more regular poops and have been thrift shopping like a pro. I just snagged an a-MAZ-ing set of rattan furniture for the living room. It's going to be incredible with all the plants I plan on acquiring. I don't think I'll be buying anything new besides mattresses. I'm so friggin' thrifty! I'll be posting all the pictures when it starts coming together. Though I may get some colorful pieces from where I work since I love some of the stuff we sell. Such as...

Lousy Smarch Weather

I'm ready for summer. It just ain't right when the weather decides to be poopy on weekends. I'm also ready for Daylight Savings and a new place to live and a puppy and a million dollars and a vacation and a new, sexy haircut. I did dye my hair last night. Same ol' Clairol Flare Me "Rose to the Occasion" as it looks good fresh or faded with my skin and eyes. Maybe I'll have my blessed cousin cut my hair next weekend, every time he cuts my hair it looks great and grows out beautifully.

Did the karaoke this past Thursday with dear Brandy. Love Shack 100%.

Was offered cocaine again. Declined again. I figured I just didn't have that many chores to do. Not much to do at all really. No stressful deadlines. No lack of enough energy or focus. Maybe if I had one o' them corporate-type jobs and no soul. Or just went through a really dark phase of not liking myself. It's not crack, but I prefer a laid back demeanor. Coffee fixes me up pretty okay.

The snow just kept dumping over the weekend... the kids get a snow day today, but not little ol' me. I did get the tax return dough and will be moving into my own pad ASAP. Which requires a bit of time and attention during my normal work hours and it'll be so wonderful when it's done. It would be great to get a place with a big closet that could be turned into a little studio. Dreams.

Zoomba

Roland turned six on Monday - he seems even younger somehow. Kids DO NOT grow up "SOOOOO FAST". They take forever to reach maturity compared to so many other mammals. Six years we've been able to keep him alive and he is still all little and helpless. He's getting pretty good at reading though, I guess.

Oh, and I went to a Zombie Prom themed party on Friday, danced my brains out. I used red decorative gel (for desserts) for the blood and green for a big ol' booger and some rotting parts. Zombies aren't my favorite thing, but I was asked to go and love costumes. Roland wore a ripped white shirt over a red shirt so he could be a zombie too (he did not go to the prom though). There was a vendor selling jewelry there and I got a scorpion pin. Love it. The new job is great too, WAY better for my brain/strengths. Alright, back to working on music. Open mic is tomorrow.

Ice, Ice BB

My car needs a bath so, so bad. It's hard to justify when it's just going to get sloshed on again. Though it is always fun to take the kids and go through the automatic/drive-through carwash with this song playing:




That was Jason's idea. He's right ya know. It's magical to see all the swirling, spinning brushes and raggy things rotating and swooshing around with suds and sprays whilst this song plays. And somehow as the wash ends and the sunlight reaches the windshield again - that last little choral bit plays and it's like, "whoa".

Music just does it for me. I got to jam for a half minute with Riley and Mike yesterday. Open mic on Monday was rad. Always is, really. Hopefully I can work on some tunes with Ben Morse soon too - he told me of a job opening at a company his friend works at and I GOT THE JOB! It's an amazingly better schedule and customer service position. Call centers are incredibly not my thing it turns out.

Riley is taking me out for sushi on Saturday. I'm going to wear a retro dress I found at Goodwill and put on makeup and do my hair and post that crap in Instagram because it's art, bruh.

Out For Drinx

Take a coworker out for a couple drinks after work. They love it. Then go find your favorite face and pull them from their current engagement with five minutes notice and take them home and read silently with them and chuckle independently - be sure to do the laughing together. Knowing they don't care all that much and you don't either and want is a thing of the past, back when heat was too hot and entropy hadn't solidified you coldly in coolness. If you're not settling into a cozy routine, do it. If you've settled into a cozy routine, cut that shit out. Take the concentrated coziness and, with a dropper from a tincture bottle, put 2-3 drops directly into the ocean of hellacious stress. The reaction is astonishing enough that you'll start to appreciate the sea of a workload you've been navigating. It's salt water, don't drink it! Float on it, bitches.